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"It's like a long fuse that finally just went to its end…" VS "I just snapped"

In his Second Confession Watts repeats how he didn’t think, wasn’t thinking and that some shadowy person or personage inside him “took over”. An aspect of this may be true, but only in the sense that this shadowy figure had been there all along, brooding and bitter – resentful even – throughout the marriage.
The “I just snapped” version renders the personalities and people in this crime irrelevant, and destroys all contextual links to the past, and to history and makes the crime seem random, even accidental. Is it? In effect, no calculated malice was involved.
What’s worse? A random annihilation or an annihilation rooted – in fact marinating – in a perceived injustice? I believe this was the real thing “blinding” Watts. And somehow his affair with Kessinger made this anger and outrage even sharper, even more BLINDING. As it built up in him he found himself less and less tolerant of Shan’ann [and the kids], so that he could no longer hug her, or have sex with her [except, in his version, on their final night together.]
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9 Comments

  1. CBH

    It’s definitely the long fuse that went to it’s end with the affair, and absolutely rooted in perceived injustice.

  2. Shannon

    Everything in the highlights is correct. That’s exactly what his parents felt. It starts when Shanann threw the barbecue years back.
    His mother got a Vibe from Shanann and Sandi…..Gut feeling…. something was not right.
    My ex was 10 mins late for our wedding. My Dad and I were waiting, my Dad looked at me and said *Fuck him*. I looked at my Dad and thought…..not about me, but the dinner the gifts the people.
    It was my Worst Discision in my life, and I ended up getting married.

    • Sideaffected

      I think his Mom wouldn’t have liked anyone personally. I think no one would be “good enough” for Chris according to them. Not saying the Rzuceks don’t have their own issues but I find the Watts family deeply dysfunctional.

      • thetinytech2018

        Sideaffected – I agree with you about the Watts family, and I also think it applies to the Rzuceks as well. I don’t think either family has a healthy dynamic, albeit for different reasons. CW and SW seemed to have been raised in really odd and yet different scenarios, that did neither any favor, so when they became their own familial unit they really had nothing to model it after. Some people have great parents and model their family after that, some have the opposite and do the same, and a rare few that grew up in dysfunctional households try harder than anything to not repeat history. These two though? They were like children playing house, emulating the parts they were fond on, and disregarding anything else they didn’t like and didn’t understand. I’ve never seen two adults so over their head in debt that seemingly never fought over their imploding finances. It’s so very odd, I feel like we are missing a piece to the puzzle. There’s living in denial, and then there’s this family’s approach which seems to be sticking their fingers in their ears, closing their eyes and screaming “Nana nana na na I can’t hear you!!”. I’ve heard that ignorance is bliss, but this isn’t just ignorance, it’s like a complete rejection of reality as it is. It’s bizarre, isn’t it?

  3. Sylvester

    Might be similar to Scott Peterson. He was “supposed” to be a pro-golfer. Everyone thought he had the talent, his father encouraged him, they spent copious amounts of money on their golden boy, but then – there was someone better than him. He changed colleges – ends up waiting tables and choosing an Agriculture major. An Aggie as they call it. He begins getting moody – carries on affairs behind the backs of the women who thought they were the only one. He charms his way into marriage and becomes a fertilizer salesman. And one that sucks, and isn’t earning enough money as fast as he was spending it. Who’s fault is it. Laci’s.
    Who’s fault is it that Chris gave up his dreams of becoming a Nascar pit mechanic. Who pulled him away from his family and North Carolina to greener pastures as a car mechanic, just like his dad. It’s like he’s still in North Carolina. So he gets a better job but they are in hock and it’s all her fault isn’t it. She bosses him around, you don’t tell her no she might get mad. Odd Coder, Lee and Baumhauver didn’t bring up their finances, isn’t it. He tells them she was making almost as much as he was in the last year – then why weren’t they meeting their financial obligations. Well, it’s obviously all her fault. So agreed, I see a slow burn and a long fuse.

    • Sideaffected

      They did-remember she was sending money to the wrong address etc., he sold his car before paying it off so after that she handled money? First it was all her fault now he’s hinting at it being NK-“blinding” him and basically sexing his family to death-I didn’t know what I was doing am I a dad what’s my wife’s name I can’t think!-the affair is now “the devil made me do it.” Which he may believe, but the truth as Nick points out, is it started waaaayyy before. He seems not to know what they mean when they ask if his Mom nurtured him-“yeah she always asked how I was doing” is his response.

  4. Maura

    10 Reasons the Watts Finances Were A Factor >>>Hi Maura. Great effort, thank you. I’m republishing this as Guest Post. Hope you’re okay with that.

  5. Tracey 14

    I believe this is an accurate description of how CW felt but the long fuse began way before he met Shanann. It started in his childhood with that mother and just kept on building.

  6. Tracey 14

    Meant to say his mother not that mother.

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